Jab hum winner honge

Saw the raw youthful talent that India had been brewing in the green room but was showcased in the T20 cricket series. I liked the fact that we no longer are confined to not being demonstrative when we are mad or feel crazy or wrecked. Yeah rite cricket was gentlemen’s game, but we have changed the norms. Dhoni has locks longer than anybody ever had in Indian cricket; Yuvraj yells & screams as he likes but what matters the most is they play to win, they play to rule. They may not be able to recreate the same mania again or may do better than what they just did, point here is they made India realize that we can dream to be the winners! Lets hope our boys Inshallah keep winning & recreating the same fervor in future!!

Again, getting back to the youth, Indian Idol found quite some talented faces too. All the participants were in the 17-24 age group. They certainly made me feel old. They all represented smaller towns and came from middle class families with no filmy backgrounds at all. What surprised me was at 18 they knew what they wanted from life; boy I wish I was that mature when I was 18! The best thing about these reality shows is that they have found winners among common people. No longer you have to belong to Bombay to make it big in Bollywod or know the big shot people. Today, if you are talented, yes you can make it big.

This is real India, where talent is rewarded, recognized & valued. Yes these are the changing times where being middle class is fashionable, where your kid no more has to be an engineer or doctor, where life seems a lot more promising than it ever was!

How true!

"A foolish faith in authority is the greatest enemy of truth"

- Albert Einstein

My Folks

Ever since we are born, do we not start differentiating between who’s ours & who’s not? As a kid, we know who is family & who is not. Then our world broadens, we go to School & College. After a while, we know who are “our” friends, family friends etc. To me, this differentiation is not bad; infact it lets me know the circumference of my loyalty circle. That’s another thing, you are either loyal to your people or you are not. There are no two ways about it; there’s nothing that can be taught about loyalty. Over the period of time, however I have realized that these folks; my folks, don’t have a face! Yeah they are faceless, but come with utter soul. As I grew older, I noticed my folks don’t have a skin color or nationality or religion either! At the end of the day, all I remember is that I care for my people & they care for me. We have had lunches together, stuck through tough times & are ready to challenge the tougher! We don’t come from any kind of powerhouses, but this whole idea of us standing together is our biggest strength. We laugh on the same jokes, like or hate the same movies & food. My point is not to sound like some pseudo secularist, but to actually realize how we get attached to people just because our frequencies match or we think alike. Life can be this simple if we want to keep it this way. Why is everybody fighting over religion, color of skin & geographical boundaries then?

Disclaimer: An ammendment to my previous thought, it's GOOD if we like anybody, importantly, it's OK if we don't like anybody and vice versa!

Yun toh saare sukh hai barse…….

On my way to work, I was listening to the Swades song yeh jo des hai tera & the lyrics go like,

Yun toh saare sukh hai barse,
Par door tu hai apne ghar se…..

O my God, can’t explain how nostalgic I got! Down the heart I knew the truth quotient of these words. No matter how much I try to justify it otherwise, I can’t deny how homesick I felt when I saw the Gulmohor tree & the chai wala with his 6 cup holder stand in some desi movie. They say you can have a home away from home, but who are we kidding; can we really?
Some decisions in life are taken weighing the practical gains over emotional, but why is it that the later almost inevitably takes over the former after the goal is achieved?

With a heavy heart.....

http://www.shekharkapur.com/blog/archives/2007/07/partition_of_in.htm

A must read from the Shekhar Kapur collection. I have known a family friend of ours in Nagpur who came to India from Lahore after partition & had similar heart wrenching stories. At times I guess, life gets too complicated to judge the right & the wrong. No amount of regret can bring back the lost glory though!

Thought for the day

I read somewhere again,” Unexamined life is not worth living”. I think it is right. But I think it’s also important to know when to stop examining life. Just accept every day as it comes, just that raw moment & try to enjoy it. No philosophy, no viewpoints. Today I wish I was one of those people who live life for that raw moment!

My new muse

Very few of my hobbies have been constructive so far in life. However, cooking has always been one of them! I am going to keep http://triedandtastedrecipes.blogspot.com/ this blog updated with the recipes I use & also got a few of my friends who are very good cooks involved. My point was to have a centralized place where all of the delicious recipes were readily available to everybody. I hope this turns out to be a helpful venture!

Shantaram

‘The worst thing about corruption as a system of governance is that it works so well’.

‘If fate didn’t make you laugh, you didn’t get the joke!’

‘Without love, India would be impossible’.

‘There is no act of faith more beautiful than the generosity of the very poor’.

‘Poverty & Pride are devoted blood bothers, until one, always & inevitably, kills the other’.

‘Justice is not only the way we punish those who do wrong, it is also the way we try to save them’.

‘Every act of suffering, no matter how small or agonizingly great, is a test of love in some way. Most of the times, suffering is also a test of our love to God’.

‘One of the ironies of courage & the reason why we prize it so highly, is that we find it easier to be brave for someone else than we do for ourselves alone’.

‘Cruelty is a kind of cowardice. Cruel laughter is the way cowards cry when they are not alone, and causing pain is how they grieve’.

‘Pity is one part of love that asks for nothing in return and, because of that, every act of pity is a kind of prayer’.

Just completed reading “Shantaram” & these are a few of the quotes from the book. What I fail to understand is that how can someone having so much insight on life, fall for crime, drugs & depression? How can people stray from being right when they very much know they are being wrong? This guy had a highly philosophical approach toward life; I guess that’s the reason he found India as his home. I also learnt that we should be thankful, because for no contribution of ours, we were never exposed to the life of poverty & slums in India. It can be argued if a criminal deserves this kinda glorification or not, but just the fact that he doesn’t justify his crime or is just out there with it, makes it a lot more easy to understand him & his situation. Inshallah, his sequel to “Shantaram”, “God Willing” will be a big hit too!

Middle Wanabe turned into more than blah!

Today, would like to extend a strong applause to everybody who came from middle class families. So many dreams, sacrifices our parents, grandparents have had for us, so that our generation could be a step ahead of where they were. In my view, we all have been survivors! Survivors who stood by each other when; cash was low & aspirations bigger, absence of muscle led head strong determination, smaller dreams led by bigger ideas! These middle class families have produced stalwarts like Lata Mangeshkar, Sachin Tendulkar, APJ Kalam, Manmohan Singh, Gandhiji, ShakRukh Khan, Narayan Murthy, just to name a few from every walk of life. We have seen it all, the long lines for school admissions, the tensions to get through engineering/medical, & then to make it big in the corporate world. Communism was the thing of 50/60s, rock n roll of 70s & being middle class has been fashionable ever since I guess. Today, in Asia (India, China, Japan), Europe, US middle class forms a society, which is most influential in contributing toward economics, academics, entertainment or technology. Do the limited resources & lack of complacency fueled by a strong desire to make it bigger with every generation help the middle class achieve their dream? Most inspiring is when we see people like Narayan Murthy promote a modest life style when he can afford any luxury known.

I don’t say it is a handicap to be born with a silver spoon in mouth, it might be an entirely enticing life out there which I am not aware of & don’t miss it either. Yeah, glamour is a whole new concept as well, but it’s so damn glamorous to don success without being glamorous!
However, although trying not to sound pompous, although our nose in air, feet are firmly grounded on the earth!

F for Fan

Wikepedia claims, the word “fan” is an abbreviation of “fanatic”, however I think the concept of being a fan always arises from heart. No matter who you are, rich, poor, educated, unprivileged, you are always a fan. You always worship somebody, look upto to somebody else & unknowingly become a fan. I personally feel a “fan” is a softer side of a “fanatic”. Fans maketh celebrities who they are, fans more than often bring them down. Fans get hurt & they hurt people by being the worst critics. Fans are the ones who spent sleepless nights so that they don’t miss tendulkar batting, they are the ones who abandon Azar for some other reasons. Fans get this sheer happiness when their idols perform, are heart broken when their idols let them down. Once Arati & I were discussing this artists being judged by people thing, and I said “I am glad I am not an artist, that way atleast I am in safe hands!” & how true it is!!
In this side of the world, there is a term “ groupie” which one will understand better if you have watched the movie “Almost Famous”. A groupie is a female fan club who hang out with the rock band. Every band, Beatles, Eagles, RollingStone to name a few has had their groupies. It’s like these rockers are incomplete without their groupies. These females worship these rockers at times for attention; free gifts or at times they might be plain crazy fans! They often end up being hurt, hooked to drugs & rejected by society. Why would somebody love some one to the extent that it will hurt?
All said & done, I guess what stands true is, “once a fan, always a fan!”

Aisa Des Hai Mera.......

Excerpt of the lecture that Sanjay is planning to give in Columbus School district to help High Schoolers understand a bit about Indian politics & India in general.
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I grew up in Western India in a city called “Baroda”. This place holds historic importance since it was a province of a great Maratha King. The population of my place is about 1.5 million & we boast of one of the finest universities of the state. I did my entire schooling in English & got my BE from the same city. I was also actively involved in sports throughout my school life. If not an engineer, I would have become a soccer player!

I migrated to the US in 2001 as a 22 year old youth who had the urge to explore the world, its opportunities & vastness. I wanted to experience the deeper meanings of life by traveling beyond the horizons where my forefathers had never been before, wanted to carve a life for myself; where nobody knew me, wanted to have an identity without any parental influence. Being a science graduate, US was the land of perfect opportunities for me. After completing my masters here, I started working as a Metallurgical Engineer.

India is a country with diverse cultures, however at the same time the government is elected in a democratic fashion. According to its constitution, India is a "sovereign social secular democratic republic;" the largest state with a democratically-elected government. Today, India is the only democratic country of the world having 80% Hindu population represented by a sikh Prime Minister, Muslim President & President of the congress is an Italian Christian. I am proud of the fact that inspite of all the issues like poverty, illiteracy, corruption, we have till this date been the most secular country in the world. Like the United States, India has a federal form of government, however, the central government in India has greater power in relation to its states, and its central government is patterned after the British parliamentary system. Every state has a chief minister who has authority vested in his individual state. In my opinion, the Government works, considering the fact that the running Government is elected through democratic elections. India boasts of some of the most accredited educational institutions like the IIM’s for business & IIT’s & NIT’s for engineering. Post independence; after 1947, India has made commendable contributions in the field of nuclear technology & aerospace. Infact Indian President is a former nuclear scientist & Prime Minister is an Oxford graduate in Economics having given India the best economic reforms till date.

When our current Prime Minister was a Finance Minister back in 1992, he designed some economic policies really ahead of its times in terms of opening the economy & investing in telecommunications. The advent of the digital age, and the large number of young and educated population fluent in English, is gradually transforming India as an important 'back office' destination for global companies for the outsourcing of their customer services and technical support. India is a major exporter of highly-skilled workers in software and financial services, and software engineering. As a result IT is a major contributor of Indian economics today. All the financial magazines list India as the country where the most amount of remittances are made from US. Owing to the fluency in English & technological expertise which is available in abundance in form of the educated masses, Indian economy has grow manifold times within the last 10 years from IT outsourcing. Other economic contributors include agriculture, manufacturing, textile, tourism etc. Don’t we all buy clothes “Made in India” from the GAP around the corner in the local Mall?

Every country has its share of social & economic problems & India is no exception. India faces a burgeoning population and the challenge of reducing economic and social inequality. Poverty remains a serious problem, although it has declined significantly since independence, mainly due to the green revolution and economic reforms. Today, India is the fourth largest economy of the world in terms of Purchasing Power Parity (PPP), only behind USA, China & Japan. Economy is expected to boom in the coming years & it should bring around social changes as well.

I have been in the states for last 6 years now, & today I think its home for me. I have made some really nice friends here & have had memorable experiences. I owe a lot to India & so do I to US. Today I think globally, like there are no geographic borders physically but only in our minds & any place is just a flight’s distance away. I have started believing in the concept of having two homes. No matter where I go; Canada, Detroit, Atlanta, when I take exit 68 on I-65 south, I know I am home!

The Dark Cloud

A 7 year old widow, who never got to know her husband or even his full name or age for that matter, she is not aware of what it means to be a widow other than having to shave her head & wear white clothes. Somebody for whom life’s clock stopped at 7, who will have to live a sacrificing life because that’s what fate had in store for her. She didn’t cry when her husband died, because she knew deep down somewhere that’s what she has to do for the rest of her life now. From now it won’t be like she didn’t have a husband in her fate, but rather she won’t be having a fate at all!
It’s not some bad dream I had, but the gist of Deepa Mehta’s movie “Water”. For those who haven’t watched it yet, I won’t kill the fun by giving out the end; it is after all the most positive detail of the movie. This movie brought me down, made me feel how ungrateful I have been all my life for the independence, education, freedom, equality & above all love I have been taking for granted. How I always thought it was my right to have all this & even much more! It is the irony of our society where we still have such innocent gals living life as if they die with their husbands & in the blessed lanes of some bright lit suburbs, girls celebrate women’s day by forwarding messages, sending cards, cutting cakes, buying gifts for their sisters & moms ending the day by watching Ekta Kapoor’s soaps. Can this possibly ever change?

Pet name saga

When I was a kid, I thought giving me a pet name was the silliest thing my parents did to me. I mean hello, I had such a unique name but hardly anybody in the family knew about it! Just 3 years ago I met Balaji, a good old neighbor in New York & he introduced me to his wife by my pet name, I could not believe myself but I felt special. In retrospect, I think pet name reminds me of the time when life wasn’t so formal, serious or complicated for that matter, when nobody knew about ipods or blogging. Pet name also makes a point that you are not the same person to everybody. Today I am glad I have a pet name & when somebody calls me by it, I know that person is from inner family circle or reminiscent of childhood days. I regret the fact that I didn’t let my brother have one, because at that time I thought it was very silly to have pet names.

What is you sarcasm quotient?

Read everywhere how Amar Singh is pissed of at SRK for picking on him at some award ceremony. Personally I saw the function in bits & pieces & I thought SRK was as witty as he always is & whoever he picked on was all in good humor. But hey that’s just me & I have a dark humor side as well. Just the other day I was in a conference at Suzuki & the speaker called me “sophisticated”. I replied,” of all the names that people have called me, this hurt me the most!” He thought it was witty & he also said that anybody who can laugh at himself has it easy in this world. Later I thought more over his words & thought how true it was. People in general hate sarcasm because it’s not so sugary sweet, well folks so isn’t life. I will be wrong however to generalize this comment, I have met so many people who had this sarcastic sense of humor & they cracked me up.

Just day before yesterday, Sanjay told me Ganguly was playing good but was batting slowly, I asked him,” does he know it’s one day & not a test match?” well I am a mean person when it comes to humor, but this post doesn’t have to be all about me. I would like to use this as an open thread activity, for you all to quote your best sarcastic comments till this date! Any mockery is most welcome!

Incorrectly Practical

Where I grew up, all I was taught consciously or sub-consciously was to become a practical person on some front or other all the time. More so on the career front & just life in general. Then we go to school, learn like 18 years of math & science & become far more dry (engineer like?) or practical. Again, I cannot generalize it but I represent my mind here & that’s quite what I am like. Everything has to be practical, calculated & correct. Only a couple of years ago, I started thinking just the other way; OK, so now I am on the safer side of life (atleast that’s what I like to think), a little settled, a lot independent & mature, why not take a few decisions on impulse now? Why not just follow pure passions? Only then I realized that life was all about fighting between the mind’s impulses & practicality of the real life. Later, the mind trotted into areas like responsibilities; financial & social, commitments, insecurities et. al. How could I blow up everything for some impulse trance? Does it mean, if I follow my instincts, I would give up the control over my life? Ironically is it not that when we give in to passions, we breathe freely? Certainly giving in to passions does not mean being irresponsible. Is it why when we see those eccentric painters, sculptors, scientists we think they look like psychos? On the other hand, they are one of those few blessed individuals who give in to their passions, don’t care for what people think is right or how they look, they don’t let the world control them, but they have a complete control of their world. Yes they don’t have a normal family life or social life, but then they have to achieve so much more in one life & they know mundane things will be taken care of by nature.
And so what if I don’t have passions as defined as these people have, I can always make a few impulsive decisions like buying a Mustang over a Civic, or taking a job which pays $10K lesser. The more I think I about it, the more I feel that not everything has to be right from worldly standpoint. If this post makes any sense at all, it’s OK to slip onto instincts every once in a while!

Analyze this & that II

Last time I visited Parul, she told me that I think too much & feel too hard or criticize things too much at times. I admit, things like doctors making mistakes, political opinions, secularism, people not turning up on time et al are my all time favorites. I am publicly apologizing if I would have ever hurt anybody unintentionally. I think people are who they are for a reason, for the circumstances they are exposed to in life.
However, I have a question, what is wrong with feeling hard about people; situations; just life in general? Why should Indians not turn on time that they promise? What is wrong with having strong opinions (as long as you are not judging people)? What is wrong for eg. with seriously liking Gandhian philosophy or not liking anti-secularist notions? Again, I know it takes all of a kind to make this world. So you need the jumpy-jovial kind, you need the care a damn kind, you need the humanitarian kind, then friends; what is wrong with being my kind? Somewhere down the heart I have always believed that people who have strong opinions are most of the times the ones who have the capacity to bring about a change in the norms of the society. How can you possibly grow intellectually or bring about changes without having opinions or thinking or believing hard in something? What is wrong with having opinions, when it's OK for so many others to not have any? Why should everybody like you? Or again, am I just thinking too much? How else would you like the jumpy/jovial breed unless y’all were not introduced to my kinda log heads!

Black & White

Coffee machine didn’t vend as well as ate the money, packed lunch but forgot to bring it to work, missed my exit & the next exit is after 10 miles, Christmas brownies that I promised at work got burnt, lost the books that I ordered from Amazon, its so cold that even the computer is frozen, lost $200 in blackjack, I missed the last show of guru & saw the first of salaam-e-ishk which turned out to be a disaster, no new messages on orkut, my American airlines flights always get delayed.

Saw a flock of geese on the way to work, although I claim not to; noticed the beautiful sunset, khosla ka ghosla surprisingly turned out a nice movie, mustang gave a mpg of 20 miles/hour, got stopped over for speeding but didn’t get a ticket, got cheetos as well as 45 cents from the vending machine, talked to all of my friends & grandma on the weekend, outwitted Sanjay more than once (we have a mujori contest going on all the time at our place; me being the soul contender!), did excellent in word power section of reader’s digest, Ratan Tata took over Corus & not to forget, COLTS won the superbowl!

For those who know me, I was never the positive person you tell your friends about; but hey I admit it’s not always that bad!!

Analyze this & that

I finished reading, “The Monk who sold his Ferrari” quite some time ago now. Always wanted to read it because of the rave reviews it was showered upon by the west. The author, Robin Sharma is of Indian origin & has penned down a neat piece of work. I personally think the book is OK; way overrated by the media. The book might have appealed to the west because of the philosophical way of life practiced in India which the author has preached which is unheard of in the west. All said & done, to what extent can a book affect anybody’s life? I have always believed in reading because; you improve your hold over the language, are introduced to new ideas & thoughts & more than once get inspired. However, can books like “how to win friends” or “blah blah by Dale Carnegie” actually change your personality or traits? Is it actually possible to win friends or maintain them by reading a book? One can get influenced by words & get into a trance but what when you come back to the real yourself? More importantly, what about those who don’t read books at all? It certainly doesn’t mean they are not aware of the better things in life. Or is life a better teacher than any books? Do we learn the best from making mistakes or real life experiences?

To leave or not to?

Ever since I have been in US which has been a little less than 5 years, I have always observed friends & acquaintances arguing over an all time favorite “should they settle in India or US”. I have individual opinions on this one & rather have mixed feelings. These days I have also learnt that to have opinions is one thing & to express them in a judgmental way is another; especially so when opinions are so relative. I have also started believing that there are “grey” areas where you can dwell happily & not every thing has to be either right or wrong. However I will try not to stray from the focus.
Honestly speaking, I find US a great place to live & raise kids. A place where they can be what they want to without yielding to the pressure of what people think is right. I have observed one thing every single day since last 5 years; the level of respect I got as an individual cannot be disregarded. From my experience, you don’t have to be “somebody” to enjoy life; you do so even after being “anybody”. One thing I regret for myself is the career path I chose without considering my options. I am happy where I am, but how do I know that I would not have been a better teacher or journalist or lawyer. When I saw grad students who were in materials field because that’s what they always wanted to do, I question myself often; what was it that I always wanted to do? I am afraid my answer doesn’t match what I am today. Again, all this freedom & individuality can be exploited & kids can get into drugs & liquor & things of this nature that I am not aware of. I also take the safer path; you can get into this no matter where you are, but the probability is higher in US. These days I have started thinking globally, I mean any place is after all just a flight’s distance away.
That was my side of the story, whenever people say they want to move to India, they give reasons like our family values, morals, social manners, education system & “sanskriti”. At times I fail to understand these factors. I have seen Americans who have as good or better family values than us, morals, work ethics etc etc. Italians, Chinese, Japanese, have family life & good morals. I just read that in Noida, kids were robbed of their kidneys & killed. http://www.shekharkapur.com/blog/archives/2007/01/a_mothers_lette.htm#more What sanskriti or morals do we talk of? I don’t want to leave an impression that I am not patriotic, yes I am, I am proud of my country, I am proud of the qualities I have just because I am an Indian, & also the family structure. But any Indian is as special as any Italian or Venezuelan, they all have rich traditions, values & more so, very similar to ours. Indians who feel like they should move back home, may do so & those who think they should stay here for good should stay back; whatever suits you & your situation. I am not sure what I am going to do. However, let’s ask ourselves a question, who are we to judge everybody else’s way of life? We always complain of Americans racially discriminating against us, what better do we do?

West coast trip

In 2006 we accomplished the most awaited (by me) west coast trip. Almost 5 years in US & I have seen pretty much all of the east coast & Midwest, but hadn’t been at all on the west coast except for the rainy Seattle. I always thought; all the places are same in US with the exceptions of the terrain, accent & attitude. I mean no matter where you go, everybody still eats in Taco Bell or buys stuff from Kroger. It’s not like India where every place has some specialty of its own. However, the terrain on the west coast was entirely different than what I was used to in the Midwest or south.

SF day 1&2: K welcomed us & took us around SF. SF came across as a very lively place with a flare of its own. Entire downtown boasting of the IT companies, Pacific & the Golden Gate; not to forget the crooked street. It’s quite a cliché though, but we had to take our pictures there as every other desi. Pacific beautifies this place evidently. Napa valley was OK, I thought it was overrated, S found it “worth once a visit” for the kind of wine lover that he is.

Vegas/Grand Canyon day 3, 4 & 4.5: Whatever happens in Vegas actually deserves to stay in Vegas! Whoever came up with the idea of building a sin city right in the middle of a desert was quite innovative; for the kind of employment it has generated around Nevada. Yeah right, now Vegas actually owes us $500! However, the hordes of people I guess make it difficult for the officials to maintain the decorum. Terrain wise, I thought it was wonderful, huge cactuses & mountains, had never seen anything like this! GC is truly a marvel; although it was very chilly.

LA day 5,6 & 7: Fun in LA actually started by celebrating R’s b’day. There is one thing I like the most (among others) about S’s friends; absolutely no hang-ups group! The day started with us strolling across the Hollywood walk of fame; which again I was expecting to be a lot more glamorous than what it turned out. Nobody was interested in going to actual Hollywood strip or Disney so instead we ended up strolling on Rhodeo drive in the Beverly Hills area. Looked forward to spot some celebrities; but I guess they were unfortunate to miss us! Although we all can claim to have spotted Jackie Chan’s dad & Lucy Liu’s mom (some random Chinese people walking around). Malibu visit was worth every minute that we drove along; awesome beaches boasting of sunlight 12 months a year. No doubt all the celebs die to live in Malibu. The wonderful day ended with S’s b’day bash.

California stood up to it’s expectations!